How to Act Like You’re On Top of Your “Ish” (Even When You’re Not)


Beverly Reyes

Author Andrea Hunt tries to make it look like she knows what she’s doing.

Andrea Hunt, Staff Writer

High school is a rough time in our lives. Between the overwhelmingly constant school work, jobs, after-school activities and social lives we run out of time.  This leads to a lack of preparation and time to put yourself together.  We all know the feeling of waking up at 6 a.m. and only being able to pull on a pair of sweats, pour coffee and maybe get to class on time.  In school you may be walking around like a zombie and see upbeat, awake people (like Mr. Manka) and wonder if they are actually aliens in a human disguise.  The trick is to pretend like you know what is going on.


Rule #1.

Put on a nice, workable outfit—it makes you feel confident and in turn, you exhibit a positive attitude (much like the aliens walking around our hallways).


Rule #2.

Get to class on time. If you are there for the start, you won’t be frazzled and not know what you are working on in class and sit there in a confused stupor.


Rule #3.

Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. (The aliens’ main life source.)


Rule #4.

Taking part in the class discussion will not only keep you awake (for those of you who tend to doze off after a late night filled with homework), but also help you remember more information!  If you know the information, you can do better on tests.  If you do better on tests, you can get a great grade for the course.  And if you do well in the course, you can do well in life! It’s a full circle, my friends.  Now, the aliens will try to dominate the discussion, but you just have to fight back.  You must never let the aliens win—never surrender!


Rule #5.

Excuses are your friends.  Not cliche ones, like “my dog ate my homework,” but use current issues to your advantage, such as “I had a panic attack when I started imagining Trump as our country’s president,” or “my computer just started playing Netflix and wouldn’t let me change it!”


Rule #6.

Disregard rule #5.


Rule #7.

Being part of many clubs is great, in moderation.  It looks great on college applications and helps you meet new friends.  All that aside, it can be difficult to find a balance between the clubs and homework and you need both for the full high school experience.  Let me put it in easier terms to understand: you may want to eat all of the cookie dough, but maybe balance it out with some carrots later—it won’t taste so great when you’re stressing out about biting off more than you can chew.  Aliens don’t have to worry about this; they can do it all and have no emotions.


Rule #8.

Sleep is key.  I know what you are thinking, how can I possibly get any sleep with all of this work?  Truth is, I don’t know the answer to this one.  But, I do know that it is better to be running on full energy all week so you can complete all of your work, rather than running on E all week and only half-doing all of your assignments.


Rule #9.

Stuck deciding whether to go hang out with your friends or study for a big test? The answer is easy—have a “study group!”  The way you do this is you study for about 25 percent of the time, complain about all the work you have to do 30 percent of the time, stress eat 20 percent of the time and watch stupid videos or talk about the latest gossip 30 percent of the time.  Aliens have group meets too, but not like these.  They actually focus and do work.  But don’t feel bad, no one actually wants to be like the aliens.


Rule #10.

Pay attention! If you had, you would have realized that the previous rule added up to 105 percent! Good job, you read each of the rules carefully and considerately.  Now just pay attention in school, don’t get brainwashed and you’ll be alright!